As an animal lover, certain things are just horribly painful to remember. Topping that list, for me, would have to be watching a beloved pup get attacked at the neighborhood dog park. Our pets love us unconditionally and they trust us to help keep them safe — especially at a place they associate with fresh air and free-roaming fun.

So it’s hard to describe what was going through my mind when I saw our sweet rescue pup, Grant, get assailed, pinned down and mauled… not merely once, but twice over the course of several years. The shrieking yelps and helpless, panicked look on Grant’s face are appalling memories. In both cases, a much larger dog abruptly lunged at my 18-pound Shih-Tzu mix, taking him down in seconds. The only thing that saved his life was the fact that I, along with several other dog owners, were mere steps away and closely monitoring our pups. Without even thinking, several of us jumped into the fray and urgently attempted to disengage the larger dog.

In one case, a dog at least five times Grant’s size had him pinned to the ground with her jaws; in another, a large, burly, muscular dog not only went after him, but also began lunging at me while the other owner sat halfway across the park, texting on the phone. Over the years, dog parks have dotting the suburban landscape in ever-increasing numbers — generally, for good reason. Daily exercise helps keep our pups active and healthy. It also gives them the chance to socialize with other canines while we gain pet-related insights from other humans. These parks are designed to provide a secure open space; but several hidden dangers can lead to perilous situations that put both pets and people at risk.

Considering what Grant experienced, it took us a very long time to venture back to our neighborhood dog park. Before we did, we worked with several pet behaviorists who helped us understand how skirmishes often start, and what we could do to help avoid them.

What follows is a list summarizing their skilled advice:

1. Understand animal aggression. Based upon my own experience with abused rescues, I recognize firsthand that canine aggression can often stem from inadequate socialization or unresolved fear. It can also be triggered by painful ailments like arthritis. Yet for some dogs, aggression can represent an inherited inclination, a breed-specific tendency — even a neurochemical imbalance. A dog who acts out aggressively is not necessarily a “bad dog,” or even deserving of blame. Dog parks put numerous canines in direct proximity, and get them pretty wound up. This recipe, statistically speaking, can represent a stew of behavioral predispositions just waiting to boil over. Keeping a watchful eye is imperative.

2. Learn about leash anxiety. To a dog, a leash is extremely unnatural. It can feel highly confining and anxiety-provoking. Basically, an uncertain or uncomfortable dog who may want to get away is tethered helplessly in place. This is true when a leashed dog meets another leashed dog; it’s true when a leashed dog meets an unfamiliar human; and it’s especially true when a leashed dog is swarmed by several dogs who are off-leash. Where might this latter occurrence take place? At a dog park. What can happen when a distressed dog has no retreat? Sometimes, a dogfight.

3. Recognize human habits. People with similar interests tend to interact. Like canines, we’re social creatures. But we also have a responsibility to keep our dogs safe. It’s easy to be lulled into a sense of security by a structured fenced-in area, serene natural surroundings, pups having fun, the fresh open air. It can also be easy to forget that our dogs prioritize sights, sounds and sensations differently than we do; and that aggression can escalate in a matter of moments. Vigilant owner attention — from a close distance — is crucial.

If you’re texting, chatting on the phone with your back toward your pup, or reading your new book, your attention is divided at best. And making a “quick run” out to your car, sans your canine? That’s like leaving a young child completely unattended at the playground. Your physical presence and direct proximity can make a vital difference when seconds count.

4. Combine #2 and #3. When you and a familiar fellow human enter or leave a dog park with one or both pups on-leash, do you pause for a quick social visit? Remember that you may be eager to interact, but your dogs… not always. Unfortunately, the leashes hold your pups in a fixed position whether they like it or not. This formula can prompt some not-so-cordial canine behavior. At a dog park, our top human priority needs to be the safety of our dogs and the humans around us. For the sake of security, human socialization should be secondary.

5. Guard against gatekeepers. Ever notice what happens at a dog park entrance gate? My trainer friend calls it “the welcome waggin’”— a throng of canines who cluster together and rush forward to check out every “new kid” who strolls in. Next time you enter a public space, consider how you might feel if everybody in the building simultaneously ran over to give you the exuberant once-over. Tense and overwhelmed? Probably… and the same holds true for our dogs.

Moreover, canines entering on-leash are at a double disadvantage. The smartest owner option? Avoid this situation altogether. As an alternative, visit the park during off-peak times. Or let your pooch sniff others through the fence — but be on the lookout for growling, flattened ears or other aggressive postures. More than one dog bite has occurred through wooden slats or chain-link metal. Paws down, the safest approach is always to delay entry until you’ve got a clear, open space.

6. Work on verbal cues. Knowing how to call your dog off is important — but remember, an attacking dog may ignore verbal cues altogether. Two animals in the middle of a fight are in survival mode. They may not register or even recognize you at all.

7. Be honest with yourself. Wanting to see the very best in our beloved pups is totally human and perfectly understandable. So it’s often best to have a candid heart-to-heart with yourself before ever setting foot in a dog park. Does your canine guard food or treats? Do you have an anxious pup who displays reactivity in unfamiliar situations? Has your dog ever snapped at, lunged at or bitten anyone? Sometimes, limiting the toys or treats you bring to the dog park — or keeping your dog away altogether — is the most responsible decision you can make. And remember, a long walk or jog is a perfectly wonderful way to enjoy fresh air and sunshine together. You can socialize your dog on your terms… and your pooch will adore you for it.

8. Be honest with others. Another human tendency is to sidestep conflict or avoid perceived insult. But if you notice a dog at the park with whom your pooch has had previous problems, don’t tempt fate. Stay out — or at a minimum, stay away — and be forthright with the owner if you have to. Not all owners are open to practicing dog park etiquette. Yet just like us humans, some canines simply don’t get along. 9. Don’t rush in. That’s right — don’t do what I did. That was pure panic response.

When you charge in or grab a fighting dog, that canine will either react from sheer reflex or perceive you as a new aggressor. Either way, you can suffer horrendous injuries. Now I always carry an air horn and a break stick at the park. The air horn can (sometimes) startle fighting dogs from a distance, causing a distraction. The break stick can break a dog’s grip, but never use one without proper behaviorist training. In a hostile situation, you can also try looping a leash around a dog’s back hindquarters to pull him up and away, like a wheelbarrow. But the best solution, by far? Do everything in your power to avoid a fight in the first place.